Why can't I turn off the perfectionism my job demands?

You and your team hold a line most people never think about. One slip and someone does not go home. That is real. The vigilance is earned, not paranoia. But you have started running your whole life at that same pitch. You proofread your partner's sentences. You cannot let a mistake go, yours or anyone else's. Your team's debriefs turn into confession booths instead of after-action reports. This is not the job anymore. It is a habit that outlived its post. You did not choose to feel this on duty. You do choose whether it comes home with you, and whether your team makes the aftercare worse instead of better. That choice is yours today, not someday. And if the weight never lifts — if it follows you into sleep, into every quiet hour — say that plainly to someone outside your team too.